Author: Laura Lee Carter

Leaving the city behind for a new, rural lifestyle – My Colorado experience

/ Laura Lee Carter / Leave a comment

Six years after leaving the suburbs of Fort Collins (50 miles from the Wyoming border), for a new lifestyle west of Walsenburg (50 miles from the New Mexico border), I feel I have a good sense of what that kind of major change feels like.

The first thing you must do if you are considering a similar change is to let go of any idealized illusions you may have about finding pastoral perfection. You may eventually find it, but it will take some work!

Think of this move as a complete ‘leap of faith” That’s what it felt like to me! And in case you didn’t get the memo yet, in this lifetime, perfection is a mirage… I didn’t have any delusions of grandeur, I was just plain scared. What if I hated it??? It was definitely a precipitous move on my part. I just didn’t know what to expect. On the other hand, Mike was certain this was the right move for us. So we did it anyway, with all of my anxieties and fears fully intact…

When we arrived in Walsenburg with our full-to-the-brim U-Haul truck, we moved into a century-old miner’s home, the only ‘decent’ rental in Walsenburg or La Veta in June 2014, and yes, it was as dirty and disgusting as it sounds. Then we started to work on finding an architect and a blueprint for the passive solar home we had been planning in our heads for years. We had already bought a few acres of land twelve miles west of town on a hill overlooking the Spanish Peaks. But because there was only one building inspector for the WHOLE COUNTY…

it took over five months just to get a proper heat-absorbing slab on our land.

But after ONLY eight more months, our 1,400 square foot passive solar home was completed! Building in this rural area is DIFFICULT and agonizingly slow! Did this surprise us? Somewhat. Timing was the source of much of our frustration and stress.

Our view of the Spanish Peaks the day they put up our roof!

But we (and our relationship!) survived, and the final product was as close to perfection as I have ever experienced. We joked around about the following cartoon before we moved down here:

But, as it turns out, this is actually true for us. For months after we moved in we would sit and stare at the mountains right outside our windows, drinking in complete silence and serenity every time we looked out.

It felt like we had moved into a deluxe foothills retreat as nice as anywhere we had ever stayed before. Almost daily I experienced inexplicable fear that the resort management would be coming around soon to kick us out!

With Mount Mestas to the west.

TO BE CONTINUED…

Looking to learn more about our big move to rural Colorado experience?

Check out my memoir here!

Send me an e-mail and I’ll give you a great price on a copy of your own: MidlifeCrisisQueen@gmail.com

Building a Southern Colorado Foothills Garden From Nothing – Summer Solstice 2020

/ Laura Lee Carter / 6 Comments

So we have been living in rural southern Colorado for six years now, after a precipitous (on my part!) move down south from our nice home in suburban Fort Collins in June 2014. It took over a year to build our passive solar home here, because building in this rural area is DIFFICULT and agonizingly slow! Then came the garden…

Here is where we started out in 2015. Empty ground, which quickly turned into volunteer sunflowers and weeds in our first year here.

Four years later we are here.

The reason my garden is named after my brother John is because he came up from Arizona for a few years in a row to help us finish the hardscaping. He was here when we laid concrete out there. He was here the next May to help Mike lay out the stone walls…

John & Mike (above) finally laid down the gravel last May. Mike has also put his heart and soul into this project! And I should add, none of us have good backs in our mid-60s!

What a satisfying achievement though!

Through a few years of testing out a number of different native xeriscape plants, I have narrowed my selection down to those that actually survive the winters here and that terrible wind we get regularly.

Lavender and Spanish Peaks 2018.

Now I know what type of lavender luxuriates in this climate…

I also know Penstemons LOVE it here, as well as many kinds of birds, lizards, beetles, and butterflies!

A native Showy Four O’clock, Blue Mist Spirea, Yarrow, Red Knight Knautia and Catmint thrive here!

There have certainly been a number of frustrating moments in this process, but I love my garden now. It gives me GREAT and continuous JOY, especially in the spring & summer months…

BEAUTY IS THE GARDEN WHERE HOPE GROWS!

My Salute to Caregivers Everywhere!

/ Laura Lee Carter / 6 Comments

One thing I have learned from first caring for my husband when we first met, is that providing care for those who need extra help almost always involves guilt of some kind.

So many of us understand the importance of this work…

Back when Mike and I first met, he suffered from Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS) regularly. This meant trying to find doctors who understood this generally misunderstood and mistreated illness. The worst of the docs always blamed the victim by saying that CFS was caused my mental illness and had no biological basis. Thankfully the CDC eventually showed these MDs to be quite wrong. (Description of CFS at the CDC)

But in the meantime Mike had to go on regular short-term disability from his jobs. I had no previous experience with caring for others. I found that he generally felt guilty of having this terrible illness, and I felt guilty that I was not a more patient and compassionate caregiver.

Since moving down south six years ago, Mike’s health has improved dramatically. He rarely suffers days of CFS. And it’s a good thing because my health has gone downhill quickly. My main problems now are extreme hypoxia, defined as: “deprivation of adequate oxygen supply at the tissue level,” difficulties with consciousness and balance from a previous traumatic brain injury, and quickly failing eyesight (cataracts). And, I would like to add, DEPRESSION:

because I never had any major health problems before age 60. My how quickly things can and DO change! Luckily Mike is a marvelous caregiver! No guilt involved.

In addition to all of this, my Dad recently died from a short illness right before the announcement of the COVID-19 pandemic and lockdown in mid-March. This meant that my Mom, who had never lived alone in her 86 years of life, was suddenly quite alone and grieving terribly. Thankfully, my sister and her husband live nearby and provide every kind of loving care for her everyday. But with my health tenuous at best, (we have 3 known cases of Covid-19 in our county and over 20,000 in the Denver metro area where my Mom lives), I haven’t been able to go help out with my Mom’s care.

This means my sister is absolutely EXHAUSTED both physically and emotionally from helping Mom out day-to-day while I sit down south feeling breathless and guilty. I’m sure you can imagine how all this feels for both of us…

She does not blame me or anyone else, she and her husband are just completely worn out! There must be so many of you who are living through similar circumstances right now, with no easy answers, but lots of difficult circumstances to deal with everyday.

That is why I feel the need to salute all of you who have put your own life on hold while you care for the millions of friends and family members who desperately need your help. I love every single one of you for your bravery and dedication!

“The Last Full Measure” is an important Vietnam War story

/ Laura Lee Carter / 2 Comments

This is a very well-made film worth seeing if you still remember what the Vietnam War meant in our history. If you know nothing about this war, even better!

I was born in 1955 and I can honestly say, nothing in American history impacted my young life more than the war in Vietnam. Those born in 1955 were the first who did not have to deal with “the lottery”, a government program that determined by birth date whether you might soon be drafted and sent to Vietnam to fight. So many men I have known throughout my life experienced this war first hand, and none were the same afterwards.

In my generation there was a dividing line between those who believed in this war and those who abhorred it. Certainly you must have heard about or seen the protests in the 1960s and 70s. “Oh no, we won’t go!” So I wasn’t too sure I wanted to watch the 2019 film “The Last Full Measure,” but I’m very glad I did.

Remember: I HATE war movies and I also hate thinking about what happened in Vietnam… But I still highly recommend this film!

This is the true story of how William H. Pitsenbarger, an Air Force medic, personally saved over sixty men during a rescue mission over Vietnam on April 11, 1966. Pits (as he was called) willingly chose to leave the relative safety of his rescue chopper to aid men on the ground when he saw how bad the situation below had become. When the medic below was killed, he put himself at great risk to do everything he could to help his fellow soldiers. After saving many, he was ordered to escape on the last helicopter out of a combat zone, but chose to stay behind to save and defend the lives of the men of the U.S. Army’s 1st Infantry Division, before making the ultimate sacrifice in one of the bloodiest battles of the war.

The story behind this story is the present day efforts of a Pentagon staffer to investigate why Pitsenbarger never received the Congressional Medal of Honor. Scott Huffman, who at first did not want this messy assignment, ended up putting in his best full measure to right this historical wrong. He spent months tracking down the men who were saved by Pitsenbarger’s bravery, spending the time to understand their true trauma and sacrifice.

This is a very well-made film worth seeing if you still remember what the Vietnam War meant in our history. If you know nothing about it, even better!

All of the performances by actors like William Hurt, Ed Harris, Samuel L. Jackson and Peter Fonda’s last performance in a film, reminded me of the conflicts and contradictions we Americans experienced by being involved in Vietnam. And I must add, Christopher Plummer’s performance as the father of the hero in this story, reminded me so much of my recently deceased father.

Garden Notes – June 5th 2020

/ Laura Lee Carter / 5 Comments

In spite of drought conditions down here in southern Colorado, my garden continues to bloom. May, usually one of our wettest months, was rough here, with a little over a half inch all month. In the past week or so we have seen Colorado Springs, two hours north of us, receive a half inch of rain as well as Trinidad to the south. We just keep getting skipped over…

But still my sky garden blooms!

The most dependable early bloomers, even in a drought, are the Walker Low Catmint, Yellow Yarrow and Rocky Mountain Penstemon, although I am also having great luck with ‘Red Knight’ Knautia Macedonica and Red Gaillardia now that they are established.

Remember Rocky Mountain Penstemon (Strictus) has to overwinter once before it will bloom.

A couple volunteers I really enjoy each year is the very early local Penstemon, Yucca flowers and…

…the Showy Four O’Clock, which grows from a taproot deep in the ground.

I am lucky enough to have one perfectly located in front of my Buddha. This was not planned, it just happened. It’s just starting to bloom now.

After the great disappointment that Perennial Favorites near Rye has closed for good, I hurried down to the nursery in Walsenburg and purchased two new plants this week. I bought a couple Echinacea ‘Mellow Yellow’ and ‘Dusty Rose’ Salvia. I’ll let you know how those two turn out later.

I’m trying to get some non-purple flowers in my garden, but it isn’t easy for a a total purple lover like me!