Rebellion is difficult, freedom priceless!
It only occurred to me recently that I am going through at age 60, what most went through in their teenage years. I would say I have always been a good girl, to some extent, doing what was expected of me. Two husbands and three graduate degrees later, it seems I have changed.
When Mike and I hatched the plan in late 2013, of selling our lovely home in Fort Collins (suburbia), to build a passive solar home in rural Huerfano county, I had no idea how much my family didn’t want us to do this. I guess I figured it was our business, but apparently not.
Come to find out, I have somehow betrayed my family by making my own decision. This has brought up a lot of other types of rebellion for me, rebellion I never felt at age 18 or 19. I feel angry that I have always done what was expected of me instead of what I wanted to do.
I know, better late than never…
I now recognize so many old tapes in my head, telling me what to do and how to act. These go against my own needs and desires, and yet it seems strange to be finally telling them to shut up.
This is where my own inner wisdom comes in. I now have six decades of wisdom stored up from just living my life day-to-day. I know myself very well.
I finally believe in my own wisdom. I know how I wish to live. I only wish my family had more faith in my judgment.
Want to learn more about my mammoth move from suburbia to rural southern Colorado? Go see here!