My MOST stressful year is almost over!

Surprise, surprise I found our builder out there this morning BEFORE 8 AM! I guess he just figured out we are moving in, in a few days! Time to get the stove in…

I was VERY DISAPPOINTED to find out my entire counter will not be finished until after we move in. And guess what? He won’t get paid until that’s finished either…

I have been trying not to totally stress over these final days, but I would say it’s not working… I am having daily meltdowns lately.

Poor Mike, perhaps this wasn’t the year to get off my estrogen patch.  🙂

IMGP3926At least Kristy helped me get my fancy bath back splash done this week! I planned the whole bath around the colors in that tin lavender sign, and I’m really happy with the results! This photo doesn’t show the colors exactly how they look.

IMGP3919And on another positive note, the native sunflowers are numerous this July. Check out the view out of our front door.

IMGP3923This is the view back towards the front door. I have to remind myself daily that all of this stress will pass, and then we will be set for some SERIOUS rest and relaxation!

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Sharing difficult times with a life partner

Rasta Mike and LauraI had an insight this morning. I have most certainly experienced more difficult times in my life than this past year and a half; struggling through the process of leaving our old home, past lives and dear friends behind to build in this new, rural setting.

A number of tough times in my twenties, thirties and forties come to mind, but I have never struggled like this while sharing my life with a partner. Now I know it is both easier and harder to struggle with major life challenges while intimately involved with someone else.

It is easier for the most obvious reason. With the right partner you can experience understanding, encouragement and support in your darkest hours. This is an amazing benefit to someone like me who has spent most of my adult life living alone.

The hard part is when both of you get down at the same time, what I call “Who stole the bright side.” It is so essential that we work together and not push each other away with guilt or blame when things get tough.

IMGP2959So glad we have each other to turn to. I cannot imagine this experience without Mike’s loving support and caring. This is “sustainable living” at its most basic, and Rasta our little dog helps immensely too… comedy relief is ESSENTIAL!

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Are You Willing to Fight For Your Dreams?

One of the most important lessons I have learned from my midlife struggles, is the need to be willing to fight for my dreams. This journey began for me back in 2004, when I lost my job and then spent months in introspection.

I focused on this question: What do I need to happen before I die?

How to Believe in Love Again!I concluded that for myself I needed to find ways to believe in love again. I so wanted to find one genuine love in this lifetime. This book is a summary of what I learned in this process. I fought through a lifetime of tragedy and disappointment to change my perspective and find new faith in the power of love. Then I found a great new partner within a few months.

With Mike I found true partnership where we are able to work successfully together towards shared goals. One of his lifetime goals was to build his own solar custom home with an incredible view. This is the goal we have been working on for over a year now.

So many obstacles have arisen in this process. Leaving behind our life of 20+ years in Fort Collins was our first challenge. I wrote about that extensively in my memoir of this entire experience. Suffice to say this kind of change is never easy.

IMGP3099We moved into a 100-year-old little house in Walsenburg and put much into storage last June. It took five months just to get a proper slab completed in this rural Colorado county.

IMGP3203We noticed every step of the construction process was costing much more than we had budgeted. We found that our contractor was not taking bids for work, but simply using his regular sub-contractors. At that point Mike decided to take over the contracting part of the process. He took bids from both local and Pueblo companies and cut over 30% off the cost of the electrical and stucco work. Our builder was not happy.

IMGP3292This week, after almost a year of struggle, we were finally ready to complete the inside of our home. We have collected everything we need to complete the kitchen, baths, trim, etc. The response from our builder? I may be able to get to that in a few weeks. I went ballistic! In response he hung up on me.

Luckily Mike apologized profusely, and so we’re back on track again. It will all get done, and we will move in sometime in July, more than a year after we moved here.

IMGP3403I tell you this NOT to discourage you from pursuing your own unique goals, but to warn you that pursuing dreams can get ugly sometimes.

You must be willing to fight for your dreams…

How did I end up here, feeling so fortunate?

It’s a long story, one I can now share with you in my new memoir!

Remember: WHATEVER YOU’RE NOT CHANGING, YOU’RE CHOOSING.

A visit to the old Libre Community in Huerfano County, Colorado

When asked about the best thing that happened to me this past week, I could only answer my introduction into a whole new world in the northern part of my new county.

1969_Jim Fowler,Libre Growing Brain SunriseSince moving to Huerfano County in southern Colorado last June, I have heard various references to the Libre Community, established here in the late 1960s as an alternative to traditional American life. Some call it a hippie commune, but Libre is a community of families or individuals who have been invited to build their own homes. These structures as well as the land they are built can never be sold. Which is why Libre has endured since 1968 while the communes of northern New Mexico and southern Colorado are long gone. New members were required to build their own homes and then homes were traded between members as needed.

Luckily I connected with one of the elder members of this community at a local function. Sibylla invited Mike and me up to see and learn more about the history of Libre. So last Saturday we took a drive up to see these rural dome homes built in the shadow of the Wet Mountains.

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Sibylla now lives in what she calls her “hobbit house” which I found quite an apt description. Most of these dome homes started small and were added on to through the years. Sybylla is a transplant from Germany. She and her husband moved to Libre in the early 1970s and built a larger home for their family. Now she lives alone and so she has moved to the hobbit house.

IMGP3547We enjoyed her hospitality, wonderful stories and a cup of tea on her back patio while looking at tremendous views of the distant mountains. She referred to her bird feeder as her television as they have no TV or Internet up there, and the phone gets hit by lightening sometimes! Sibylla is an artist like many who came to Libre.

Dean's house at LibreAfter a few hours of fascinating conversation, Sibylla took us next door to meet her partner Dean Fleming, a founding member of the Libre Community. Dean lives in a larger dome house which he uses as his art studio. The views of the Wet Mountains were amazing from here.

What a fascinating afternoon full of warm friendship, interesting elders, and local history…

Laura and rasta close upWe’re newcomers to rural southern Colorado, so after a few years I decided to compile a diary about my life after moving here from Fort Collins. We chose the foothills west of Walsenburg to build a passive solar home. Please share this blog with your friends if they are considering similar life changes. Contact me directly to discuss any of these challenges, and to order your own signed copies of any of my books. Email me at: MidlifeCrisisQueen@gmail.com

 A Memoir of Retirement: From Suburbia to Solar in Southern Colorado

Drywall, Thunderstorms and Libre…

We experienced the most intense thunder storm yesterday in the foothills west of Walsenburg in southern Colorado. A half inch of rain in an hour and the lightening was amazing!  We have lots of great progress up at our custom home. Who knew drywall could take a few weeks?

IMGP3536We found an excellent local man, Ron Pino, to do our drywall. He started out working with his Dad when he was only six! He works alone and is doing an incredible job for a very reasonable price. He’ll start texturing the walls today and then we can begin painting the interior.

Not the most exciting part, but it all has to get done!

We have been collecting all the parts we will need to complete the interior of the house. You try to sit down and think of EVERYTHING you need to finish a house inside. It’s tough! Luckily Mike is extremely detail oriented… thank goodness!

Libre signIn the meantime we met a woman who is one of the original members of the Libre Commune north of here.  Libre was established in the early 1970s as an artist community, with lots of unusual dome homes. There are still some members in the area. If you have any interest in this topic, check out the book  Huerfano: A Memoir of Life in the Counterculture.

We are invited to go visit some of the original homes up there! How cool is that?

Dean's house at LibreYes, we are keeping busy meeting new people everyday, and enjoying a different view of life on the long and winding road into rural America…