What does retirement mean to you?

October 14, 2015July 5, 2016 / Laura Lee Carter / 4 Comments

I have observed that there are just about as many responses to the idea of retirement as there are people. Many count the days to retirement. They see it as complete freedom, and can’t wait!

Others fear that kind of freedom. They are convinced that they need to be contributing at all times, and feel driven to continue for reasons of self-esteem and/or legacy.

I believe this has a lot to do with early brainwashing. If your parents are driven to contribute, than you may also have that driving spirit. If your parents look forward to retirement as reward for a job well done, you may too.

My family is the hard-driving type, and my siblings also feel that they have no purpose if they cannot work.

My new husband at age 50 saw things differently. Because of serious health issues, he wasn’t able to hold down a 40+ hour a week job past age 60.

When I first met Mike ten years ago I was still quite driven. I launched myself into my new writing career with my usual enthusiasm and stubbornness, convinced that I could make it big as a blogger and author.

Over the past ten years my attitudes have changed dramatically. Mike has convinced me that being hard on myself and driven does not lead to contentment or even a happy life. It just leads to frustration with myself and others.

At what point is it OK to give yourself a break and say, “You are fine just the way you are.”

I have given much thought to my feelings about myself when I die. I do not believe that I will feel any better about myself then, if I produce more books or make any more money.

My time now is mine, and I plan to spend it doing whatever I choose, not feeling driven by my fears or my ego.

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A Few Great Boomer Blogs for Your Consideration

September 14, 2015December 12, 2015 / Laura Lee Carter / 4 Comments

This is my favorite fantasy image of a blog carnival!

Ever since I started keeping a blog in 2007, I have belonged to what was then called a “Blog Carnival.” The idea is to share with my readers a few posts by other boomer bloggers I enjoy reading. This post is #417 in that series. Yes, I am a member of the longest-running boomer blog carnival ever!

This week I wish to share a post from “The Survive and Thrive Boomer Guide” by Rita R. Robison, consumer journalist. Rita generously keeps us up-to-date on consumer issues like the fact that American credit card debt is up substantially. She says, outstanding credit card debt is expected to be more than $900 billion by the end of this year, bringing the average household’s debt balance to $7,813 – the highest amount since the Great Recession.

Meryl Baer reports that she enjoyed, sort of, the movie A Walk in the Woods, starring Robert Redford and Nick Nolte. Read her review here. She also headed West for a wedding. Her adventure began in the airport. Check out what happened in Jetsetters R Us.

Tom Sightings was inspired by the movie, The End of the Tour, a biopic of David Foster Wallace starring Jason Segel, to pick up a book of essays by this celebrated writer. For Tom’s reaction, and a small window into the mind of the genius of David Foster Wallace, head on over to The Ultimate Question.

I began my week with an unfortunate backward tumble off a short ladder, which landed me in the ER for a few scalp staples and a week of aches and pains. I have to quit falling like this…NOW!

At least this stumble afforded me some nice nature watching right outside my door! Oh that’s bad, no that’s good, so the Chinese fable goes…

When did you first begin thinking about retirement?

August 29, 2015February 4, 2016 / Laura Lee Carter / 4 Comments

Mike and I had an interesting conversation yesterday about retirement. I was talking about how strange, but wonderful it is living here in the southern Colorado foothills, when I said, “This was really your dream, but I love it!” So he turned to me and asked, “What was your dream?” I was totally stumped.

When I met Mike over ten years ago, I was unemployed after an unfair firing at age 49. I was actively worrying about my next house payment. I don’t recall ever thinking about retirement! In fact, I had only thought so far as to put away as much money as I possibly could. That was about it.

So I asked him when he started thinking about it. He said he began dreaming about it in childhood. That was when he first imagined having a tremendous view in a rural mountainous area. The man has always had so much more vision than myself.

I’m not completely sure why, but I have always had trouble fantasizing something better, and in this way I now see how I have severely limited my options.

Why bring this up? Because I now think it is so important to teach your kids to continue to visualize a better life. If you can’t visualize it, you probably won’t be able to create it. These are the words I live by now:

Abundance is how we live in each moment – the choice to be open, the choice to entertain the possibility that we can have, create and attract what we truly want.

Only Love…

August 14, 2015January 3, 2023 / Laura Lee Carter / 2 Comments

While I’m talking about songs that are new to me since we headed south to retire, have you heard this marvelous song by Wynonna Judd yet?

This is another one introduced to me by Bob our musical ex-landlord. When we first moved down here last summer his daughter was getting married, so he gave us a recording of all the songs he played at the wedding. What a great idea!

This song captures for me one of the greatest lessons of my life. It took me decades to decide that in the long run, love was the best reason to continue to exist.

Soon after that discovery back in 2004,a wonderful teacher appeared to teach me even more about loving another person well, heart and soul.

Mike is not a perfect person, but he does know how to love others, and I feel so honored that he chose me to love so completely. What luck! Our love story could be any 49-year-old’s dream, which explains why ‘Falling in Love at 49’ on my previous blog “Midlife Crisis Queen” has been enjoyed by over 10,000 readers! Love is certainly lovelier the second time around!

Yep, over ten years later I am even more convinced I hit the jackpot on this one! At least I did get it right here at the end!

A New Week in a Spectacular New Home In The Southern Colorado Foothills!

August 3, 2015November 3, 2016 / Laura Lee Carter / 12 Comments

So relieved to have our final move behind us!

All I feel is gratitude for the many ways my life has changed since I decided to make love my highest priority back in 2004. I see now that if I hadn’t decided to find a way to believe in love again back then, none of my other goals could have been achieved.

First there was my fortuitous meeting with Mike in early 2005, which led to having the courage, time and energy to begin a new writing career. My books followed as Mike and I’s relationship grew.

Then, when the time seemed exactly right, we decided to move out of the city forever and found this lovely valley to build in with 180 degree views of the Spanish Peaks and the Sangre de Cristos. But if Mike had not had the vision and the proper skills to create this home, it would have never been built.

The peace and quiet, the chilly air in the morning as the sun comes up, this is heaven or close enough for me.

How did I end up here, feeling so fortunate?

It’s a long story, one I can now share with you!

Drywall, Thunderstorms and Libre…

May 2, 2015December 28, 2015 / Laura Lee Carter / 3 Comments

We experienced the most intense thunder storm yesterday in the foothills west of Walsenburg in southern Colorado. A half inch of rain in an hour and the lightening was amazing! We have lots of great progress up at our custom home. Who knew drywall could take a few weeks?

We found an excellent local man, Ron Pino, to do our drywall. He started out working with his Dad when he was only six! He works alone and is doing an incredible job for a very reasonable price. He’ll start texturing the walls today and then we can begin painting the interior.

Not the most exciting part, but it all has to get done!

We have been collecting all the parts we will need to complete the interior of the house. You try to sit down and think of EVERYTHING you need to finish a house inside. It’s tough! Luckily Mike is extremely detail oriented… thank goodness!

In the meantime we met a woman who is one of the original members of the Libre Commune north of here. Libre was established in the early 1970s as an artist community, with lots of unusual dome homes. There are still some members in the area. If you have any interest in this topic, check out the book Huerfano: A Memoir of Life in the Counterculture.

We are invited to go visit some of the original homes up there! How cool is that?

Yes, we are keeping busy meeting new people everyday, and enjoying a different view of life on the long and winding road into rural America…